The Simple Life by Fred Kosnitsky
My wife and I discovered a new malady a little over a year ago: TVNV. You won't find it in any of the medical textbooks. You won't even be able to research it on the web. As far as I know, we're the first to get the symptoms. But let's start at the beginning.
Last spring we gave away our two somewhat ancient (early 1970's vintage) color televisions to an area charity. The first place we tried to give them to, Recycle North, wouldn't even take them for their training programs - I guess spare parts weren't available for these dinosaurs. But we eventually found a taker, and I'm happy to say that life has been not just tolerable without them, but downright fun-filled, stimulating, and joyous. Now, instead of watching "Friends" we're visiting friends.
This is not to say, however, that four to five decades of immersion in television culture simply disappears when you give up television cold turkey. For a couple of months after getting the televisions out of the house, I noticed some behavior that made me realize that kicking the habit wouldn't be as easy as I thought.
Some Early Symptoms of TVNV
At first, it was just my wife showing some of the early warning signs. "Boy, wouldn't it be nice to just curl up on the couch tonight with a video. Oh, wait! We don't have a TV or a VCR anymore, do we." I could feel the sharpness in her voice. Luckily, I had developed a pretty thick skin around this issue, so even her knife-edged tone couldn't cut me. "Sweetie," I reassured, "we can always go to a friend's house if we want to see a video." "But I can't curl up on my own couch with you at a friend's house," she countered. She had a point there.
The next sign of advancing TVNV occurred during our vacation out west last summer. After a few days camping and backpacking, we decided to stay a night at a motel in West Yellowstone, the tacky gateway town to Yellowstone National Park and the Beartooth Mountains we were aiming for. Hot showers and sleeping on a mattress sounded awfully good.
That night she settled right in with the clicker. I paid little attention to what was on the screen as I got gear together or did some reading, but then I heard that familiar sexy voice. She had found "Nikita." It's a show I'd only seen a couple of times before, but both of my sisters love it and talk about episodes when our family gets together. Now it had grabbed my wife's attention, and the constant changing of channels stopped. I noticed that I put down what I was doing, too, and was watching intently. TVNV is evidently contagious.
Living with TVNV
I don't know of any TVNV support groups out there yet, but maybe this is something I should look into. Perhaps there are others out there just like us who are struggling with kicking the television habit. I've tried visualizing something along the lines of a traditional twelve step program: "Hi, I'm Fred and I haven't watched in three weeks." I've thought about something perhaps a little more intimate and informal: maybe just a few close friends to get together with and talk or play Scrabble or listen to music when the urge to catch an episode of JAG or Touched By An Angel gets really strong. We'd have to hold the sessions at our house, of course, since these friends all have televisions at their houses (triggering the NV of TVNV).
Maybe there's help out there in a format I haven't even imagined yet. I tried searching the web under TVNV, but it seems to be an as yet undiscovered malady. I can report with certainty, however, that it is real and it does get worse with time.
Later that summer we were strolling down our street in the evening. We live in a great neighborhood of tightly packed homes that are right on the street. As we passed each house we could see, through front windows, who had their televisions tuned to which particular shows. We discussed whose living rooms afforded us the best views, where on the street we could set up a couple of folding chairs, and how we could rig up a remote that would allow us to turn up the volume and even change their channels. We were joking of course, weren't we?
The Triumph of Science Over TVNV
Most of the time nowadays, I hardly notice the grip of TVNV. I'm working, or writing, or enjoying the outdoors, or volunteering, or -. Well, you know, just going about the business of living. In fact, research has shown that there are at least three thousand four hundred and seventeen things you can do that are better than watching television, with thousands more yet to be tested. Once again, science has triumphed over a disease, even if it is a disease that is not yet officially recognized or posted on the internet.
Still, this past weekend my Dad, brother-in-law, and nephew were visiting for our annual boys' weekend. We had a great time hanging out, touring the countryside, playing poker, and just generally being goofy. But just before they were ready to head home, my wife got a call from our friend Steve. The World Cup finals were on. Did we want to come over for the game.
Steve is our best friend, but we jokingly refer to him as Stevie TV because he does have a TV. Before Sharon had put down the phone all the guys were already buckling up in the car to head over. My Dad, brother-in-law, and nephew obviously were suffering from the well known disease "TVitis." They were deprived of television for the weekend and in need a dose of tv sports. But for me, it was a case of the more mysterious TVNV. It's been over a year now since my set left the house, but just when I think I'm symptom free, along comes something like the Winter Olympics. I'll keep you posted on my progress.
The Simple Life presents Two Depressing Television Facts
1) The average American child sees over 20,000 television commercials every year! Source: How Much Is Enough: The Consumer Society and the Future of the Earth, by Alan Durning (paperback, published WWNorton).
2) Scientists who study brain-wave activity found that the longer one watches television, the more likely the brain will slip into "alpha" level: a slow, steady brain-wave pattern in which the mind is in its most receptive mode. When watching television, people are receiving images into their brains without thinking about them. So if you look at your child in front of the TV and think of him or her as "zonked," that is apparently an apt description. Source: In the Absence of the Sacred, by Jerry Mander (paperback, published by Sierra Club Books).
The Simple Life presents One Optimistic Television Fact
1) You don't have to watch a lot of television. If you so choose, you don't have to watch any television. Itıs your choice: you have the power to decide.
Please send your questions, comments, and suggestions to The Simple Life, 108 Central Ave., S. Burlington, VT 05403, or e-mail fredk@together.net.